The Price He Has to Pay

With Crabby sleeping on the floor more often due to his back (wouldn’t want him to get it checked out would we?), Willy has decided Crabby’s side of the people bed belongs to him now.  No more waiting for his turn in the rotation – Willy believes his rightful place is next to me, on the people bed, every night.  On those “Good Back” nights when Crabby does sleep in the people bed, Willy is horrified when forced to make other sleeping arrangements.

There’s a problem with this, however:  Willy has decided spooning is a requirement.   Not a bad thing if it’s a human who showers.  Not so pleasant when its a dog who doesn’t.  At bedtime, Willy squashes himself against me, and until I roll over into the proper spoon position, with my arm around him, he will snort, sneeze, shimmy, flop, look over his shoulder at me, and sometimes even growls.  I tell you what, to have your dog threaten you if you don’t spoon him…  it’s an experience!

Most of the time I accommodate,  but sometimes Willy smells, well, like a dog, and I really don’t want him under my nose.  In those instances, I roll over, my back to Willy, in the hopes he’ll just move over to his side of the bed.  Nope.  If I don’t spoon Willy, and Willy wants to spoon, he spoons me.  We’re talking flip over, move the back legs out of the way to get maximum contact, left arm draping over me, head on my neck.

Given the current sleeping circumstances, Willy necessarily gets more baths than any of the other dogs – every 2 weeks, at least.  For those who don’t know Willy, bathing is not on his list of acceptable activities.  Each bath is followed by either pouting,  anger directed at my person or other such behaviors intended to let me know just what a lousy person I am.

He's going to make me pay for this!
He’s going to make me pay for this!

Here is the photo shoot post-bath today:

Usually Willy goes somewhere outside the house traffic lanes to mourn his treatment.  Today, however, he stayed pretty public.  And it wasn’t that he just stayed in view, he stayed in view, in his “I’m mad at you” posture, for quite a while.  It gave me several photo ops – 126 pictures over the course of 28 minutes, with 3 walk aways on my part,  before Willy realized I wasn’t going to apologize.  At that point, he gave up and went to sleep.

When Willy is mad at me, he holds his head high, chin level.  This is not a happy camper!
When Willy is mad at me, he holds his head high, chin level. This is not a happy camper!  Note avoidance of eye contact.   He wasn’t speaking to me, after all.   This was when he was in “You hurt my feelings” mode.
I tried to move into into his field of vision.  This was the result.
When pity didn’t work, he tried to ignore me.  This was the result.  I’ve got 3 shots of Willy deciding to sleep with his nose in the air…
When I moved into his field of vision, I was met with daggers.
When pity and “I’ don’t see you” didn’t work, the daggers came out.

No worries readers, Willy never goes to bed mad at me.

As an aside…  Do you not find it at least a little justified that Willy’s take on our relationship is starting to creep me out?  I mean, I realize he’s a dog in physical form only, but the inside, including the brain, is a human male, but still…   it’s getting more than a little weird.


9 thoughts on “The Price He Has to Pay

    1. It’s not that only one wants to sleep with me, it’s that only Willy, Morty, Emmi and Pablo have the ability to get on the bed themselves 🙂

      Emmi is up most nights, Pablo every night, Morty occasionally, and it used to be Willy, at least until Crabby went to bed. This gave us the ability to rotate in the rest.

      The ‘usual’ method is to rotate – 3 small, 2 medium or 1 large each night. With Willy staking his claim, he forbids all but the little ones who sleep under the covers (they aren’t there if he doesn’t see them) from getting on the bed. He’s worse than Crabby!

    1. I have no issues with men of the 4 legged kind, except for Willy, and that’s only because he is so freakishly like the 2 legged kind of man 🙂

  1. I thought it was more of a “Don’t let me see your face” kind of look. All he has to do is stick a paw in the air and it could become a “Talk to the Paw”gesture.

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